Ryerson, can I vent to you for a moment?! It’s no secret at this point that I commute for an hour to school everyday from Scarborough. Now when you think Scarborough (after taking your mind off of the terrible, sterortpical and UNTRUE reputation we have) you probably think ‘hmm.. that’s not too far. That’s a 15 minute drive from the downtown core.’
EXCACTLY!!! That’s the problem! When you think about it, I live fairly close to school but our oublic transportation system, The TTC (Take The Car) is SO EXTREMELY FLAWED that it takes me an hour of travel time!
As though that isn’t aggravating enough, I then have to put up with ignorant, selfish, TTC passengers. In the Caribbean they’d be referred to as having ‘No-Broughtopsy!’ but since I’m speaking to a broad audience I’ll refer to them as lacking any sense of Big-City-Social-Conventions-WHATSOEVER!
So here it is, I feel it’s my duty… no, no, my OBLIGATION to school every Torontonian on how to behave while taking public transit (keyword being public… not private! As in not your own private living room where you can simply sprawl out without having to mind others who would also like to sit down).
Here are your TTC Commandments. So It Is Written, So Shall It Be Done!
1. STAND RIGHT, WALK LEFT!!!!
There’s nothing more aggravating then a love sick couple who insist on holding hands, standing side by side while going up the escalator. I’m always in a rush. Even if I’m not in a hurry to be somewhere I’m the type who doesn’t like strolling and standing still. Don’t get in my way. And for those mornings when I am late for school and tourists are standing on the staircase taking your pictures with your peace signs up… stop it.
2. LOUD CELL PHONE TALKERS
I understand those few times when there is a delay in the schedule and everyone is rushing to call into work, or the people you are meeting before the train goes back into the underground tunnel therefore you have to yell because you’re losing cellphone service quickly. There’s also the time when the bus engine is extremely loud and you have to make a quick 30second phone call.
Both of these scenarios are completely acceptable.
Other than that, try to keep both your voice level and phone calls to a minimum.
I don’t care that Jessica tried to add you on Facebook last night and you ignored her “LIKE OMG! FML!”
3. There is an empty seat beside you but you choose to block it by sitting on the end.
I’m not even referring to the times that you choose to rest your large gym bags or over sized purses on the seat next you, although those times aren’t acceptable either. You’re just blatantly claiming your territory although we all paid the same fare and have the same right to an empty seat as you do. ONE, SINGLE SEAT! not two! not the entire row!
which brings me to …
4. Men who sit with their legs WIDE open, therefore taking up 3 seats.
Don’t exaggerate. we all know your junk is NOT that large that it would be absolutely impossible to sit with their legs in the same area code. Better yet the idiots who do this while sitting next to you and you have no choice but to cross your legs or squeeze them together because you don’t want to continue with the awkward leg brushing.
5. I don’t care how many grocery bags you have, how many text books your carrying, or the amount of hockey sticks you’re hauling around
KEEP YOUR BAG OFF OF THE SEAT! YOU A LAP AND THE GROUND IS THERE TO ASSIST YOU!
6. Wait for me to get off of the train before you run in.
7. Give senior citizens, pregnant women, and children your seat.
I hate seeing old ladies struggling to grasp onto the pole at the back of the bus while standing beside me. Yeah, we’re all tired. We all just want to relax and get home quickly, but damn.
8. WHEN DID CHIVALRY DIE?!?
Yeah, yeah we had the whole feminism movement but I just think it’s respectable for a 35 year old athletic man to offer me a seat when I’m fondling the pole in a pencil skirt and heels. No I’m not doing a dance for you, I’m attempting to keep my balance.
9. I’m guilty of it too but I’m going to make it a point to turn down my iPod.
Let’s agree that I won’t make you sit through my soca mix if you don’t make me sit through your heavy metal, satanic noise.
10. DON’T HOLD UP THE BUS BY YELLING AT THE BUS DRIVER!
So you got caught using an invalid transfer – it’s your fault.
You don’t have your student pass and they’re making you pay full price
One idiot actually caused the bus driver to put the bus out of service while on my way to school because he decided to spit on and punch the driver. Why you ask? Because the driver would not allow him to sit on the platform at the front of the bus which clearly says ‘This is not a seat’.
What are some of your TTC Turnoffs?