[blockquote source=”Doris Day, Que Sera Sera”]When I was just a little girl
I asked my mother
What will I be
Will I be pretty?
Will I be rich?
Here’s what she said to me…
Que sera, sera
Whatever will be, will be
The future’s not ours to see
Que sera, sera
What will be, will be.[/blockquote]
Can you believe we’re almost at the end of May?! I hope everyone is enjoying their summer so far. Whether you’re in summer school, working, or lounging around- try and take a few minutes of your day to soak up the sun because who knows how long this weather will stick around (…it actually snowed in Winnipeg last week).
So as I mentioned in last week’s blog, I’ve been feeling a lot of anxiety lately because of how close I am to moving back home, my mountain of student debt that I have to start paying off and ever since this month started, my birthday. There are exactly 10 more days until I turn 25. In my eyes, that’s a quarter of a century and 5 more years until 30. I know people say age is nothing but a number, but growing up I had this timeline/vision for my life of where I should be and what I envisioned myself doing. According to that timeline, I should have graduated with an engineering degree 3 years ago, living on my own, passport full of stamps from traveling, and on my way to starting a family.. clearly not the case now.
I always look back and wonder “What if I never moved after high school to Calgary? What if I stayed in engineering? Where would my life be now?” It’s these what-ifs that keep me up at night. This should be an exciting time in my life, and it really is, but I can’t help but feel a little behind in terms of where I should be and where I am now. 2 of my friends who are a couple years younger than me are moving onto Master’s programs after graduation, and here I am, turning 25 and just finishing undergrad.
Whenever these thoughts fill my head, I try to pull myself out of that dark cloud of What-Ifs by reminding myself that I am exactly where I am supposed to be. A quote that really struck me and I found to be very true was mentioned in Danielle’s blog last night week, “comparison is the thief of joy”. Everyone is on their own journey- whatever that may be. This year, I’ve really learned to trust the timing of my life and to try and see the positive out of every situation. Sure, I wasn’t successful at my first try in University, but I’m proud to say that I made it through my second round (and with Honours!). I may not be on my way to starting a family just yet, but I’ve met and made a lot of friends along the way who I consider family now. So what if I’m turning 25 and I’m just finishing my undergrad? I say it doesn’t matter how old you are, 20 or 100, just as long as you finish.
In 10 days I will be 25 and 12 days after I will be walking across the stage in the auditorium to receive my degree. I’m turning 25 and I feel like my life is just beginning and that I’ve got a lot more livin’ to do. I have this little cheerleader on the side of my shoulder telling me not to let a number/whatever timeline I set up for myself define who I am or where I should be because “life isn’t about the destination, but the journey that gets you there.” *end of cheesy quotes*
I’m going to end this week’s blog with a song my dad used to play growing up and the inspiration behind this week’s blog, covered by one of my favourite artists, Corinne Bailey Rae.
Until next week,